Unpacking Tales of the Capital

It’s amazing what can be revealed during one simple conversation. Let’s unpack.

It’s Empty

The name “The Empty Throne” isn’t an empty description 1. As Bug points out, it’s been empty for 500 years in Realm-time.

Gnomish Narrativists who have a vibrant faith, such as Agent Sills, believe this all comes down to Narrative. There is something about their political turmoil which helps power the imagination of the Unimagined World. They also believe their suffering in the present will pay off at a later date, when Narrative will require them to be politically sound.

Bug thinks this is bunk, and if it isn’t bunk he’d like to punch Narrative in the face. If all the two-timing, conniving, self-centered politicking is according to some plan, he wants no part of it.

Nobody finds Bug’s profound resistance to Narrative amusing. Of course, Nobody finds a mud puddle amusing.

Embittered by Politics

The discussion about the nature of Realmian politics is another one of those points which seem eerily applicable to our current political climate. In reality, the idea of The Realm being in political shambles has been around for years. It’s always been called “The Empty Throne.”

None of the character’s low-opinion on politics is without merit, however. As the Horde began to regroup following their defeat at Boarsblemish, they began to plan a second invasion. The Realm, with its forces depleted and it’s political will non-existent, would have certainly fallen. Only the deployment of the firewall kept the Horde from victory, and it almost didn’t happen. Socks nearly bought The Realm to the brink of annihilation.

As it was, the political delay on the project inadvertently lead to numerous skirmishes in and around the pass, during which Sandy’s mother was fatally wounded. In the end, the firewall was deployed while the Dwarfish engineers were under heavy fire from the vanguard of the invasion force.

Enough Excitement

Unlike most people, Professor nobody does’t put a moral value on the word “exciting.” To him it’s neither good nor bad it just is. Unfortunately for him, he never seems to have grasped the concept other people don’t share his view of the matter. Thus, the epic tongue-lashing from Sindy.

But, despite his communication challenges, Nobody does have a moral compass. He did realize the plight in which the Council of Governors was placing The Realm, and so acted accordingly. In a brief moment of social clarity, he realized the only action which would make any difference was one against which all other drama paled in comparison.

So he shot a Governor. But only to wound, and he treated him right away. Sills was ordered to arrest Nobody on the spot, but really didn’t want to. She thought it was the greatest thing she’d ever seen 2.

The Classics

The Classics are beings of such Imaginative presence and duration they’ve moved beyond the power of normal copyright. As such, they tend to look down upon the other Realmians, and don’t contribute very much to the war effort. In fact, they tend to believe the other Realmians are inferior beings, and many are secretly hoping the Horde wins the war so the riffraff will finally leave them in peace. This attitude is known as “classicism.”

The Hoard, realizing how the Classics were impervious to their normal munitions, developed “translation toggles.” Thus, while a Classic’s essence was naturally immune to injunctions, the Hoard’s scientists managed to shift a classics’ existential existence into the protected realm of “original translation.” Any Classic Realmian so targeted suffered the normal effects of an injunction round. This is what Nobody was showing the rude governor, they were’t as safe as they believed.

How Ya Doing?

And thus Jeremy is marked as a true prophet of Narration.


  1. Pun intended, I assure you. 
  2. Bug is a nice person who pretends to be otherwise. Sills is not a nice person, and doesn’t even bother pretending. 
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